or is that just February talking?

Well. It’s just about February in Canada. I do not do February well.

I get bored and restless in February and yet I don’t want to do anything. So I sit. I sit in front of the computer, scrolling endlessly through funny youtube videos.

I understand that the millennial generation would argue that this was time well spent. Do I agree? Sometimes.

Or I sit in front of the TV watching the same reruns of the same TV shows for hours.

But I’m not really watching. I’m thinking. I’m pondering my life and my future. I find that I do that a lot since I turned 50. I have as much to look back on as I do to look forward to now. But I struggle with what I’m looking forward to.

Where am I going? What do I want the rest of my life to look like? Am I happy? I‘m not even sure I know the answer to that question. I don’t think that I’m unhappy. But I think I could be happier than I am.

Or is that just February talking?

I work ALL of the time. That is the downside of the global workplace (I work closely with my offices in Malaysia and India). You can literally work 24 hours a day. It’s also a big pitfall of working at home. You are never off duty.

But I love my job and I’m proud of my accomplishments so work is not a chore. Work doesn’t make me unhappy. Still, there has to be more – right?

Or is that just February talking?

Tips for dealing with the February blahs

I think my last vacation was 4 years ago. Granted it was a great one – I finally got to take the kids to DisneyWorld. But that was more than 4 years ago! I haven’t even gone away for a weekend since.

How could I? Weekends are saved for cleaning and errands like grocery shopping. Weekends aren’t “Miller time” anymore, they’re more like “Vacuum time!”. Good times.

When was the last time that I did something fun? I seriously can’t remember. Oh wait, I did go to a movie a couple weeks ago. Alone. Sad? Maybe. But I had a gift card and I couldn’t find anyone to go with me. And I really wanted movie theatre popcorn. Popcorn never lets me down.

Or is that just February talking?

I’ve been missing my family lately too. Nostalgia is a guest that comes to visit often when you cross over the 50 yard line. They are all back in my home town and I hardly ever get to see them.

I remember when my aunt used to show up on a Saturday afternoon just to have coffee with my mother. I would love to pop in on my sister. But she’s too far away and that kind of spontaneity needs to be arranged which is, well, not spontaneous.

I’m seriously thinking about moving back to my home town. It’s actually the only place that my BF and I can agree on as a possible retirement destination.

I spend a lot of time looking at houses on line on realtor.com and we even went to an open house once. But I’m nervous. It’s a big risk – can you go back? Is my home town as great as I remember it?

Moving isn’t the answer. At least not right now. My philosophy is that if you’re going to run, you need to be sure that you’re running “to” and not running “away”. This philosophy has served me well in my life.

what am I really frustrated about?

It may be that I need to make a change in my life but February is NOT the month to be making life-changing decisions. At least not for me.

Because it might just be February talking.

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4 Comments
  1. Since I am a big movie buff! We have to have some girl dates and go out for a bite. Port Credit is great to come and visit. Lots of places to go here. Let’s make February fun!

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